Social Media Influencer Says Our Jealousy Is Really Just Fear
Chinae Alexander is a Brooklyn-based wellness expert, who shares her life to a following of over 130,000 people online. On her namesake Instagram account, sheâ€™s known for what she calls â€œbadassery,â€ where she inspires people to think positively and actively pursue self-love and improvement.
Through a series of posts with the hashtag #bebetter, Alexander consistently speaks her truth in the hopes that it resonates with her followers. According to one of her latest posts, Alexanderâ€™s words are a saving grace to many people.
â€œPLEASE READ,â€ she often writes at the beginning of her posts, encouraging her followers to take a moment from skimming through their social feedsÂ to actually read something that might make a difference. â€œI wish I had a bigger apartment. Her husband is so much more thoughtful than mine. I bet they have better sex. A new car would be niceâ€¦nicer than what I have at least. Why canâ€™t I have a â€œcoolâ€ job?â€ she wroteÂ in her Sunday post. â€œNever satisfied with what exists, always looking over the proverbial fence to the greener grass or nicer ass next door. On the surface JEALOUSYâ€¦but deeper down, FEAR.
â€œStop wishing for the life you want. Stop fearing that things wonâ€™t work out for you. Stop looking over the fucking fence. Make magic with what you have. Learn stuff from people rather than be envious of them. Get over your desire for more material shit, itâ€™ll never make you happy,â€ the post continues. â€œAnd stop worry about your fucking ankles/thighs/weight/tits because they are just fine.â€
The passionate post is one of many that Alexander puts on her page. All of which, she explains to Yahoo Beauty, are not planned.
â€œI never make content ahead of time, itâ€™s how I keep things feeling real and of the moment. I get up and write whatâ€™s on my mind, things Iâ€™m ruminating through, in hope that someone, out there in social media universe might also be thoughtful of those same things that day,â€ she says.
Many of these things are personal to Alexander and her experiences that day or that week. All of them, however, reflect ideas that concern all humans. Wellness, relationships and change tend to be part of the larger themes she touches upon, but the conversation may beÂ sparked from a simple and seemingly uninspired moment.
â€œThis particular post was sparked by a couple interactions I had had with people that day prior, in traveling and in my personal relationships,â€ she explains. â€œEmpathy for me, is at the heart of everything, so I wanted to dig down beyond the surface emotion of jealousy, and really get to the root, FEAR.â€
In a follow-up post to the one shared on Sunday, Alexander expressedÂ some of her own fears that underlie existing jealousy. â€œI NEED YOUR TRUST,â€ she wrote on Monday, before asking that her hundreds of thousands of followers listen to her own admittance of fear and possibly share their own â€“ which they subsequently did.
Each of her posts, and her videos on YouTube, are centered around her personal life and decisions. However, her followers respond in a way that shows how accurately the vulnerable messages depict their own lives as well.
â€œI read and was confronted with my bullshit,â€ one person commented on Sundayâ€™s post. â€œThank you for confronting your bullshit on social media. It helps remind me to do the same, on a daily basis. Thanks for being you.â€
Hundreds of others follow suit in expressing their admiration of Alexander, who seems to always sayÂ exactly what they need to hear. â€œJust so on point,â€ one follower writes. â€œThank you for bringing me back to reality,â€ says another.
Although it seems like sheâ€™s figured it all out, Alexander admits that these reflections areÂ a simple part of understanding ourselves â€” something that sheâ€™s still trying to do herself.
â€œI donâ€™t have all the answers for myself or others,â€ she says. â€œBut I do think finding whatâ€™s actually going on is integral to the process of us working on ourselves effectively. Itâ€™s like if youâ€™re treating a cold but you actually have a massive flesh woundâ€¦.understanding what the problem ACTUALLY is, is the first major step in healing ourselves and becoming more empathetic to others.â€